Category Archives: rings
Dammit. I HAS Questions!
So, it’s been floating all over the internet that this dude proposed at NOON on October 1, 2016 and had the ENTIRE wedding already planned down to her dress and had the nuptials at 6?
On the same day?
He had to have been planning this with a whole bunch of folks and it seemed like the entire free world knew EXCEPT her, judging by the amount of folks up and through!
Now. They get to the venue and in the video below, I catch a glimpse of her and wondered HOW was she keeping it together..
She wasn’t. At all.
She is falling out and bawling etc and I would be doing the same darn thing.. she gon look back at this video and go lawd, I wasn’t ready!!😂😂
For ALL the Sistahs who are now looking at their men like “why can’t you do something sweet like this?” Let me beg for mercy on behalf the poor men who just ain’t built or ready for such!!
Cause if my husband pulled a stunt like this? My dress wouldn’t fit properly, it would be a science theme with robots everywhere AND y’all would have a piece of meat and football at the reception😂😂😂
Lawd I can’t!!
Bless this brotha’s sweet heart but he fittin to be public enemy number 1 out here in these streets for making men now having to step their games waaay up! See Prince and his shady face for the way men are looking right now as they face their indignant women because of this creative Dude.😂😂😂
God bless them all..
Dueces and mad love-
There is no other culture on earth more creative than black folks. Like seriously. Said creativity usually comes with folks turning up dignified nostrils witj a strong dose of disparaging comments ranging from from Assinine-Zookeeper
But if you tarry a while, those once “awful”things, become mainstreamed by other cultures because well, it was creative.
They try not to give us credit and behave like said action originated from their mommas womb but we are having none of that and will call it out.. Bantu knots? Originated between the knees of an African mother thousands of years ago but to hear folks tell it, they only got cute cause they wearing them now. Don’t take my word for it though-see case and file #29456 of emulation-of-culture below.
#shetriedit but that move above? Came from-you guessed it- black folks.
So while I love my people and are mostly proud of them, there are a few of us that just never have a can of “all together” no matter what the occasion and I am going to need them in the name of folks-may-try-this-too, to pull back the creative cords just a Tad.
I innocently inquired about a resent wedding from a friend and she said after giving me the little shop of horror face, “I can show you better than I can tell you.”
I just wasn’t ready for what my corneas doth behold.
These folks got married in a local mall and aside from the bride being so late that folks could have gone shopping and returned, when the procession began, there were so many bridesmaids, it took the Disc Jockey 3 whole songs to cover them all walking down the aisle. Did I mention each of the 15, stopping to wave with every step they took? One HAD to be fully seen cause after all, the bride done made them pay for these dresses and they were getting their monies worth honey.
I can’t even describe the colors and shape of those dresses because the lexicon required, isn’t yet created for my stunned brain.
Then miss Bride hit the stage in white pants and her top was wrap around sequins that made no earthly sense. I looked and tried but alas. They all rocked sneakers too which I KNOW is already a trend because someone got sick of standing for hours in uncomfortable shoes.
Back to the wedding.
At the bride and groom table were pump chairs so large and so white, I swore I saw a chalice or two next to them. I roared with laughter at the visual.
None of the usual traditions were followed which was cool with me since I wore an orange wedding gown to my own nuptials and broke the innanets😂😂😂 because we the people are creative like that.
I just can’t wait to see who is gonna emulate the stuff we come up with next but I need my people to move with caution because folks just pimping our style like it’s their own and gives us no Credit. That just won’t do.
Deuces and mad love,
Today, six years ago, I went on my very 1st date with the man I had been friends with for 5 years prior..
How that happened was fate because he called me on Valentine’s Day to ask who was my ‘hot date’and was shocked when I replied no one.
According to him, he took a huge risk when he offered to take me to breakfast the next day since it was President’s day and he also wanted to see the new car I had bought all on my own.. He was shocked when I said “sure!”
And so began our journey.. We met at Michaels restaurant and spent over an hour laughing with each other. The change happened when I got up to use the ladies room and was pulling my shirt down over my jeans and heard him say ” don’t pull it down. I like what I see.” I spun around in shock because not ONCE in five years had he ever made a pass at me and I asked him to repeat what he said to which he replied ” you heard me.”
I blushed and went on about my business but the wheels began turning in my head at that point. When we got back to my car, he retrieved a bag and handed it to me. There were chocolates with hearts, a mug with hearts, pencils with hearts and this cutie right here
It was a wrap after that.
Our journey for the next three years was loaded with honest communication, ( like seriously) all kinds of road trips and flights to the unknown, lots of laughter and some tears. We spent our 3rd anniversary in Chicago climbing out on glass ledges at the Sears building, exploring the city and food and having dinner on the 96th floor where he first broached the subject of marriage to me.
It simply felt like the right thing to do and I told him I would consider it. On July 4th of that year, without telling me what he was up to, he told told his entire family he was going to marry me.
I was stunned but it’s one of the things I love about him. He is a man in every sense of the word. Kind, honest, generous, not an ounce of pretense.
If you have been following our journey, you already know two years later in June 2015, on the island of Puerto Rico, we got married at Sunset.
To say I love him? Gross understatement. We have been husband and wife for 8 months and it’s been a journey filled with everything imaginable. So when my oldest son had a medical emergency last week when I was on my way home from Louisiana and had to divert flights to him, my husband not only understood, he booked a flight home for me and when I got to the airport, I learned it was in first class.
I literally stood at the counter in shock and when I was seated and served a full breakfast on real dishes with silverware and was given a hot towel while my tea was constantly replenished, I was finally able to fully exhale after a long week and catch a nap after I thanked God for blessing me over and again.
My husband knew, without my saying a word, what I needed and this was my very first time flying 1st class. I could get accustomed to this😜😜
The view from my plane spoke volumes and So today, on our 11th year of knowing each other, our 6th year of our very first date, it’s my turn to treat him.. Stay tuned..
As you can see, I kept ” Hot stuff” too and he will remain in our lives…I love and appreciate my husband. More than you will ever know.
Oh by the way? He said he knew immediately on that first date, he was going to marry me. He just had to work out the minor detail of convincing me it would be a good thing. His actions spoke volumes which is why I’m his very happy wife today.
Its been a long 7 months since I blogged anything but I have a perfectly good and sane reason-
I went off and married my Mister, yes I did!
You have all read untold stories about his antics filled with love and after 5 years of dating, we decided to go ahead and make this thing legal. So we packed up 50 of our closest family and friends, hitched a ride on a jet plane and said ‘I Do’ at sunset in Ricon, Puerto Rico. It was magical y’all… I cant even describe it so here’s a pic for you.
It was fabulous and as you can see, I rocked an orange silk original gown that was the talk of the island.
And then, real life began. We had to purge two households to fit into one and I remembered just how much work it is to be married. Not to fret- I still like him.
Enough about us.
I saw a post the other day on social media and after reading the comments, I became agitated.
You see- it was about a man who asked a woman to marry him and because the ring he presented wasn’t big enough, the woman gave it back and told him to ask her again when the ring was of a certain size. It took him several years but he was able to finally present her with what she asked for so they could get engaged. To add fuel to it all, I was appalled to see some of the comments from women who agreed and based their arguments on all kinds of things and one example was this- if he drove a car that was over $100k, he can afford a ring that was at least $20k.
Can we just be any more selfish in our stinkin’ thinkin’?
Whatever happened to the values that man brings to the table? Not everyone can afford a ring that will make your friends jealous ladies but I betcha this- if you love that man right where he is with nothing, he would work hard to grow your personal wealth and give you way more than a ring of your dreams. Too often, we miss good decent, men because we are blinded by what we think we ‘should’ have after coveting someone else’s rock all the while not realizing the work and energy it takes to get and stay married.
We attract to us who we are and how we behave. I know way too many people who are now in their 50’s still single because their list of the perfect man was so superficial that he literally had to be an Adonis with gold lined pockets in order for them to be acceptable.
So check it out- here is a short list of what we should see before we go digging for gold-
- Does he like his momma or the woman that raised him?
- Would he be a good father? ( watch how he behaves around family members)
- Is he unselfish in ways that matter?
- Does he have the potential to not only have a stable job but the desire to keep working hard?
- Is he kind?
- Does he make you feel special in ways you haven’t felt with anyone else?
- Does he have goals?
- Can you do small or large events as a couple and walk away feeling like you worked as a team?
- Can you be yourself and not have to change personalities when he’s around?
You get my drift right?
So many women refuse to date a man who makes less than 6 figures and that is their prerogative but please be aware, men can sense when you are seeking their pockets first and their love is secondary. They will often date you for a while and then move on to and marry, the woman who values the person and not the wallet.
It takes a man so much courage to find what he considers a decent ring and pop the question. To turn your nose up at what he can afford, sets a bad precedent that will lead to issues down the road, IF he decides to marry you after all of that.
And let’s be real- as women, we should be working on ourselves and what we bring to the table beyond degrees and money because if you are as mean as a rattle snake, no one wants to put up with that no matter what you are bringing financially to the table. There are always exceptions to this rule but its usually with a man who has no desire to strive with goals and sees you as his source to a better life.
Chile- I am just too through with folks but if you really want to know about this thing called marriage, sit down with some couples who have been on the journey for decades and get a full understanding of what it truly takes because no rock is worth the misery if you are with the wrong person.
Trust Mister and I- we both know.
I get we all want to feel special with that bling of a ring on our left hand but have mercy on the man who has to buy it for you and be sure YOU are worth it.